Some People Still Think The 1600hp White-Gold SLR Isn't Bullshit

"Mikeado" (mikeado)
06/04/2014 at 10:57 • Filed to: Oppo PSA, McLaren, Mercedes, SLR, LOLCARS, Alfa Romeo, Alpine A110-50

Every now and again on social media and desperately poor blogs, a post will pop up reporting on a "White Gold SLR" with a quad-turbo V10 developing 1600 horsepower and 2800NM (2065lb/ft) when running on biofuel, a sub-2.0s 0-60mph time and a standing quarter time of 6.89 seconds. It's been a long time since I've seen it, but it's just popped up again on Google+ (yeah yeah, make your jokes) with people going "OMG sikkkk car bruv" as if that isn't the highest order of bullshit.

If you follow the wrong Facebook pages you'll likely have seen it before, as it first appeared some time in 2012 and has popped up elsewhere on t'internet since (poorly-informed articles !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! and !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ). Fuck knows where the lies really started, although one article references !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , which posted it twice, only mentioning the ridiculous stats the !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . Tracking down the true source is probably as hard as finding the first man to have sex with a chimpanzee and thus give HIV to humankind (I read it on social media, it must be true!). The associated pictures of this magic SLR tend to show it parked outside the Mall of the Emirates, who have been asked about this car before and have responded with "we get so many cars each day that it's impossible to know when this one was here," which they probably followed up with "now bugger off."

The first part should be pretty easy to disprove. 18K white gold? Try chrome wrap, as YouTube car pornographer Marchettino can show us up close:

White gold is a very soft and heavy material to use for a car body, and coating the carbon fibre that McLaren gifted the SLR in white gold plate would apparently cause it to melt off in the 50°C heat of the UAE, where this car apparently spends most of its time. So it's not white gold. Not even maybe. It's a chrome vinyl wrap. You might as well paint a teapot brown and tell everyone it's chocolate.

As for the engine, the video does occasionally show the car accelerating just a little bit, at which point you hear supercharger whine (so not a quad-turbo engine like a Veyron or EB110) and the deep grumbling of what's far more likely to be the standard 5.5-litre V8 than a bespoke biofuel V10, perhaps with a tweaked exhaust. The BRABUS badging and wheels suggest that the Mercedes lump this car still has could have more than the standard 625 horsepower, but !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! their modifications can "only" take it up to 650 or 720 metric horsepower (PS). So, by extension, the preposterous stats and straight-line times aren't true either, unless Arabian biofuel gives an engine more than twice as much power somehow...

I know these word-of-mouth nonsense stories are what social media pages are about, and no respectable car blog or publication has given this a second glance, but I just don't get how people can believe this one at all, especially people who purport to be car fans. This kind of thing is so damn easy to make up and spread around that you shouldn't even consider the idea of a car like this being the real deal.

Now, THIS, on the other hand:

This is a special one-off Alfa Romeo commissioned by an enigmatic Russian billionaire that nobody's ever seen or heard from. Called the 14C Razzo Rosso, this car uses a bespoke carbon fibre and titanium spaceframe chassis to give a weight of just 495kg (1091lbs) even though it's packing a 9.0-litre V14 hydrogen combustion engine - described by some as "like a 9-litre Formula 1 engine" in engineering terms - and advanced active all wheel drive. These unique features give it 1705PS and a 0-60 time of 1.7 seconds, 0-100mph in 3.8s and a top speed of 301mph, but also 60mpg and no CO2 emissions at all. Apparently the owner, who spent $5.4million to have the car specially made with its whale-penis leather interior and graphene body coated in seal blood, likes to outrun the cops every morning on the way to work with it!!!!!!!!!!!!

PLEASE SHARE THIS SO I CAN GIVE MY LIFE SOME KIND OF MEANING KTHXBAI

DISCUSSION (11)

Aya, Almost Has A Cosmo With Toyota Engine Owned by a BMW. > Mikeado
06/04/2014 at 11:03

Back then when i visit saudi gas was like 30cent per gallon or so.

Why bother?

briannutter1 > Mikeado
06/04/2014 at 11:11

with those tires, it runs 11's no matter what horsepower.

wkiernan > Mikeado
03/04/2016 at 09:02

Called the 14C Razzo Rosso

I’m walkin here! up yours you son of a bitch you dont talk to me that way get outa here

Flavien Vidal > Mikeado
03/05/2016 at 04:53

Huh?? That’s an A110-50... They even left the Alpine “A” on the side...

Kinja'd!!!

Pretty damn sure this Alfa Romeo 14C is bullshit...

Mikeado > Flavien Vidal
03/06/2016 at 16:53

See, I’m pretty sure you’ve missed the joke there...

Flavien Vidal > Mikeado
03/06/2016 at 20:04

ha.... sorry :)

Seemed like lots of work changing the have of the A110-50 for a joke lol

TheTurbochargedSquirrel > Mikeado
03/29/2016 at 07:52

You could have convinced me that it was a concept (a really cool one too) if you removed the Alpine branding from the side.

OPPOsaurus WRX > Mikeado
03/29/2016 at 10:53

something sounds wrong here

“white gold plate would apparently cause it to melt off in the 50°C heat of the UAE”

50°C= 122°F which is I think is like a hot tub.

white gold melts anywhere from 994°C-1097°C (1822°F-2006°F) depending on the alloy.

zack > Flavien Vidal
04/21/2017 at 14:48

its an Alfa bro

WillS22 > Mikeado
04/22/2017 at 16:27

OK, I am no car expert but if you take a Mercedes and run it through McLaren custom shop you get a little over 600 hp that is a looooong way from 1600 hp. The only Mercedes V-10 of anywhere near recent manufacture was a diesel. There are some V-12 that were manufactured but no V-10s I could find.

Gena > Mikeado
06/24/2017 at 12:18

You are a retarded piece of shit. Its the nickname “white gold” everyone knew that it was a wrap, because of its power and rareness “1of1" it got its nickname. Watch brabus’s video about it, its their own engine, own quadturbo, all own technologies. Stop writing bullshit, you jealous piece of shit.